The first spiritual expression of human life is love. Love is our greatest need. The ancient Greek philosopher’s categorized love into different types of love: philos, eros, and agape.

Philos is brotherly and sisterly love. This is the love that we feel for a family member. It is caring, understanding love but is not romantic. Not all brothers and sisters feel this kind of love for each other, but those who do have a rich and special connection all their lives.


Eros is erotic love, the feeling of sexual attraction to another person. Erotic love is only in part romantic. Eros is an infatuation with the physical and erotic aspects of love, without a deeper, more emotional and spiritual sense of belonging to each other.

 Agape is unconditional love. It means that you love someone completely, without conditions or special wishes and without hope that they will change or be different from who they are. You don’t want that person to change in any way. Agape is free of judgment, criticism, and the need to satisfy an idealization fantasy. We experience agape when we are secure enough to be vulnerable and when we synergize with another.

 The great thing about realizing that there are several kinds of love is that it shows that we have several times as many ways to care about other people, which expands the number of people we have the opportunity to love.


 Take a long walk in the rain, then towel each other dry.

 Sit in a darkened room with one lit candle, holding hands.

 Give each other a neck massage, foot massage or hand massage.

 Prepare and eat a special meal together in the kitchen.

Spend a relaxed hour together in a room without music, TV, phone or computer, just doing nothing. Feel the presence of each other.

Drive to a nearby hilltop and look at the stars.

Spread a blanket on the grass and sit and listen to the sounds of Nature.



Source: “CREATING EXTRAORDINARY JOY” by Chris Alexander.